Wednesday 24 February 2010

Do we ever really grow up? I’m talking about those feelings and desires we keep tucked away for fear of looking foolish. Having children and grandchildren is a great outlet for this as one can be seen as entertaining them. Also for me personally buying toys for the shop indulges my inner child. We have just taken delivery of the most wonderful soft toys, beautifully dressed mice and rabbits, some with knitted jumpers and one even has lace-up shoes. It is interesting the things that we loved as children stay with us. It was soft dolls that held my heart when I was young, I had a rag doll my mother made me from a black material that turned navy blue with time, she had various hair colours as it was changed from time to time as combing the wool it was made from thinned and became unattractive – its last incarnation was white, the colour it still is. At one point my sister and I cut a mouth so we could feed her our sweets, having to pull out the remains of the previous one before stuffing in another. She was very well dressed, I remember making her a wonderful black and white dog tooth coat once, but then we made all her cloths; it was all part of the game.

We also made smaller rag dolls, it is difficult to remember the size now, but about 4” tall, they had the same woollen hair and my sisters was called The Duchess; if mine ever had a name I can not remember. My brother was allowed to join our games as long as he was the coachman, he had a large stagecoach, and even then we thought it an inferior thing made of plastic, blue plastic, with yellow horses; doors that open would have redeemed it but the duchess had to suffer the indignity of having to be stuffed through the window to enable her to be driven around. The duchess had the settee for her house and I had an armchair, and we would crease a scatter cushion in the middle to made a sofa for them, they too had a shoe box full of cloths each mostly ball gowns and stoles; we never knew what happened to them, it would be interesting to see how they match up to our memories. So when I see the wonderful little mice and rabbits with their lovely crafted cloths I think how the child I once was would have loved them and hope that this generation of children will be allowed to be children long enough to make fond memories like mine.

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Thursday 18 February 2010

life's lessons

I was having a February moment last week when Tom asked me what was wrong. I answered, “I have just realised the best is behind me.” Not that I believe I will never have more wonderful moments, but I will never again run just because I feel full of life, and have the energy and stamina to do it; never again be full of ambition to build a life for the future; never again have smooth skin, be a size 10 in proportions that matter and do crafts with dextrous fingers.

Not that being older does not have certain advantages; I do not feel hard done by. I have had that part of my life and it has been a full, eventful, rich and rewarding time so far. I am still having a lovely life, packed full of experiences spanning over half a century, and that gives one knowledge and confidence. I cherish these lessons living has taught me, the most important being, ‘If you do not have what you like, like what you have.’ The more joy you can get from small things the happier a life you will have. I have always thought it was having attained the age I have that taught me this.

Sunday we took Dillon to the Eden Project, he loves it, and it was his choice that we go there. We do so every two or three weeks. It was the first Sunday of half term and busier than it had been all winter, as we approached the land train I commented to Dillon that I wondered if our usual seat would be taken; on seeing us the land train man told him it was OK our front seats were still free. We watched the skaters, made Shaun the sheep inspired models in the Mediterranean dome, had lunch, played in the sand pit, climbed on stuff and were on our way to the Core to see the machines when we came across a lawn where in the summer they had circus type activities, spinning plates, hoola hoops, juggling etc. He stopped and said, “All the toys are gone; - that’s a shame.” Then he told me to step on to the grass, “Lets do hoola hoping!.” So we both stood and wiggled our hips with imaginary hoops, he was just as happy as if he really did have the actual thing. There it was, ‘If you do not have what you like, like what you have.’ He is two and a half years old - just two and a half!
We played in the Core, went up in the lift, not a lot of those in Cornwall, lifts; played drums, watched the automata (five times) and travelled on the bendy bus. As we got in the door at home he said, (just two and a half remember,) “Thank you for taking me to the Eden Project today.” There we go again The more joy you can get from small things the happier a life you will have. My heart could have burst, may be the best isn’t over just yet.

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